Wheee Doggie!

 

You remember Jed Clampett, don’t you? You know, “The poor mountaineer (who) barely kept his family fed?”

Right?

So on Tuesday afternoon, here was Ol’ DC, making like Jeb (the ‘barely keeping family fed’ part), writing individual descriptions of Grand-Am’s Bigger Fish Found Swimming in the Talent Pool, when the stuff (you know) hit the fan with phone’s a-ringing and email boxes a-filling, signaling that Chip Ganassi Racing W/ Felix Sabates and their No. 01 TELXMEX BMW-Riley got “nailed,” to wit:

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No. 01 Team Penalized for Rule Violation

June 29, 2010

GRAND-AM Communications

DAYTONA BEACH, Fla. - GRAND-AM Road Racing today assessed penalties on the No. 01 team that competes in the Daytona Prototype class, as a result of a rule violation during the June 19 Rolex Series race at Mid-Ohio Sports Car Course.

During post-race inspection, the team was found to be in violation of Daytona Prototype Regulations 4-1.1 Engine Eligibility (components and performance levels that must be strictly adhered to).

As a result, the No. 01 Chip Ganassi Racing with Felix Sabates team was penalized 25 team points; drivers Scott Pruett and Memo Rojas were penalized 25 driver points; and BMW was penalized 25 manufacturer points (see standings).

Additionally, the team was fined $15,000 payable to Camp Boggy Creek, a full-service camp for seriously ill children and the official charity of GRAND-AM.

GRAND-AM also announced a rule change affecting any teams using the 5.0-liter BMW V-8 engine. Cars electing to use this engine must weigh an additional 75 pounds, increasing the weight minimum to 2,350 lbs.

(The above is in its entirety, but to see it for yourownself click here)

“Aha!” says Ol’ DC to hisownself, “If there’s a reference to more weight there’s gotta be a corresponding, newly issued ‘Competition Bulletin.’”

Though the bulletin all but wholly restates already long-in-the-book specifications for the “Dinan-tuned” BMW engine’s internal capacity, measurements and dimensions, one sentence stands out most (but probably due to it’s being new and in red): “Cars electing to use this engine must weigh 2350 lb.” Check it yourself, here.

(By the way: good job, Rob, with the ‘lb.’ thing! I’m proud of you. However, to be slightly more specific, I’d go for something like, “Cars electing to use the above, so described and thusly enumerated engine which originated from Bayerische Motoren Werke AG and traversed The Big Pond, in spirit if not physically, but passed through Grand-Am approved engine-building hands before being placed in a Daytona Prototype engine compartment and taking to the grid and/or competing in and finishing a Grand-Am sanctioned competition for which there is a Daytona Prototype class must weigh at least 2,350 lb.” K?)

Indeed, the crux of the rule change is that a certain Rolex Series’ Daytona Prototype powered by BMW, more specifically, for now, a “Dinan BMW” gets the new minimum weight - as do “innocent bystanders,” Starworks Motorsport’s No. 7 FlexBox/Extreme Indoor Karting and No. 8 Corsa Car Care/Extreme Indoor Karting (at left) BMW-Rileys.

Chip Ganassi (below right, with Scott Pruett, holding yet another PRS Guitar – hmm, wonder if they have a steel?) being among The Big Fish That Swim, Starworks’ main dude Peter Baron (who manages, drives, hauls, cooks and cajoles cars into going really fast, despite otherwise now apparent unseemly advantages) is among those somewhat smaller fish who would like to swim (not “sleep”) among the next fish-size up, or so. Baron’s hard work, frugality and having the guts to wear ugly shorts lies behind his ongoing push to be a bigger fish (and, likely, will someday arrive there, too, despite Henri Zogaib; allegedly).

But even when a Big Fish, rules are rules and, sometimes like the bug hit by a windshield (rarely the other way ‘round), stuff happens. (Think about it: the Sun doesn’t really “rise in the east,” or anywhere, for that matter – the issue of which having been settled just about the time Copernicus burned in Hell).

Ryan Dalziel (he’s Scottish; one can hear it in the brogue and I don’t care what Marino Franchitti pointed out about Dalziel’s surname, “Don’t you think it a bit odd for a Scott”) said, “I feel for Scott Pruett and Memo Rojas as a fellow BMW driver, knowing that they, like me, go out there and do the very best to win in whatever is driven, but I at least take solace knowing I am closer now in points to them than previously.”

AH, “POINTS”

Certainly; no question about it: the Ganassi/Dinan deal is fodder for budding conspiracy theorists (who surely will eventually mature into a “Blame Dick Cheney for Everything” type, leaving behind such mundane, lightweight and simplistic matters like “competition points.” But, like walking, talking and, probably, farting: “baby steps; baby steps.”)

With across-the-board, 25-point penalties exacted, down to seven are Scott Pruett and Memo Rojas’ formerly doggone big and darn-sure cushy 32-point drivers’ championship lead over next-closest pursuers, Mark Wilkins and Burt Frisselle (pictured at right is their AIM Autosports’ No. 61 Pacific Mobile Ford-Riley. And who woulda thunk them, eh? ).

With Tuesday’s lifeline, now only 10 points behind the leaders in third is Dalziel. Dalziel, a victor in one of the Rolex 24’s darkest ever of dark-horse victories, had formerly occupied second place in the points before slipping to third with a broken halfshaft that prematurely ended his Mid-O race (and I thought only Alex Job did such things that, like Dalziel’s, beforehand was lapping somewhere just this side of the sound barrier).

(By the way: you among the conspiratorial types did notice Dalziel, Wilkins and Frisselle had altogether different Rolex 24 rides and teams than those in the present, right? Really, there’s just gotta be something to it. Cheney?)

The 25 points helped Ford to muscle its way into a five-point manufacturer’s championship lead, while SunTrust Racing now is only 12 points behind the TELMEX team.

(Oh, just thought of another good one for the conspiracy crowd: MESCO Building For the Future Rookie of the Year Award. Yep! It’s all right there: Jonathan Bomarito leads Dion Von Moltke by one point! After all this time and despite the fact that Bomarito drives SpeedSource’s No. 70 Castrol Syntec Mazda GT and Von Moltke drives Doran Racing’s No. 77 South African Airways/MacDonald’s Hamburger Ford-Dallara DP. Heavy, dude; anyone got a joint? Or tequila? Tequila will work. Salt? Lemon?)

Brumos Racing’s Hurley Haywood (left), who’s likely seen almost every imaginable rule “interpretation” possible during his time in the sport, offered that the Ganassi team “would’ve won every single race” thus far in 2010 if not for a “mistake” in this year’s Rolex 24 at Daytona (Justin Wilson’s now infamous Moretti Chicane “burp,” later determined to be a suspension failure, likely due to an earlier off-road/line excursion) and a more recent Memorial Day Lime Rock Park incident with the No. 99 GAINSCO Chevy-Riley DP which intentionally pinched the TELMEX car into an unintended infield plow – for which no prototype is made.

Indeed, in seven of 2010’s scheduled 12 races, the TELMEX team has won five and finished second once. Put another way: excepting Lime Rock Park’s dismal 13th after failing to score big points while making like a farm plow, they’ve yet to finish outside the top 2 in any 2010 race contested.

Insistent that the TELMEX team all but flaunted its prowess in a series that in 2009 quickly issued almost draconian, later all but completely reversed rule assessments that nailed Brumos’ (and Penske’s) two Porsche-powered cars, Haywood said of Tuesday’s penalties, “The awareness of something going on was way late.”

Like a golfer who is almost sure to sail his ball after a first-swing chunk, given a moment’s thought and the realization of the considerable degree of enmity heaped upon those who fashioned the 2009 “Porsche assessments,” one can see how the series might have this year been inclined to carefully travel the path forging Tuesday’s road.

WE’RE HUMAN, RIGHT?

Beyond being “damned if you do; damned if you don’t,” who among us are individuals? A real, honest-to-gosh, hands-down individual? Someone who, say, is akin to 2002 Daytona 500 winner Ward Burton, who dropped out of North Carolina’s Elon College and proceeded directly to a nearby mountain, quite literally living off the land for better than a year. There are those who say he at one point looked a lot like Big Foot, excepting the “height” part. “Nope, that was the dead giveaway on his not being Big Foot,” said one headshaking, NASCAR type who’ll remain anonymous herein because while he may not be Big Foot, Ward can be downright ornery.

Okay, that leaves the most of the rest of us to be a part of any group, large or small, who must in certain ways behave (talking back to my mother didn’t work, trust me) or share a look (uniforms are uniforms, no matter black, pink or punk), speech (Southerners, slow and dumb; Yankees, brash and arrogant; Californians “airheads” or “Bill Auberlen,” pictured at right, nearest, with Joey Hand, far right in his famous Gatorz Sunglasses, after Turner Motorsports’ first GT win at Mid-Ohio). 

Notable psychological studies have shown humans so wanting to be a part of a group that individuals will exhibit behavior totally at odds with their perceived “regular” nature. Think not? Check out the Stanford Prison Experiment sometime.

Humans inherently wish to be accepted, be a part of a group so that we feel “accepted.” There’s nothing wrong with such because it more often than not helps guide us into accepted practices, too, which often become “fair for all.”

Who thinks Chip Ganassi or No. 1 Mike Hull (left) or, even, team manager Tim Keene will be personally assessed or adversely affected by a $15,000 fine? Certainly, even if it were to personally hit home, feeling the pinch would be lessened the higher up one’s position in the food chain, but each still would survive a personal, $15,000 hit because more than any other reason each of those mentioned are champions.

One cannot become a champion by quitting. Champions also don’t just abandon the behavior. Whether genetically quartered or socially engineered, once one wins it becomes increasingly difficult, if not altogether distasteful, to lose. Losing becomes not only unpalatable but unacceptable.

So, if they personally had been hit with the $15,000 fine, each would get on with the rest of their lives, each likely continuing their championship behavior.

But none of the above actually got hit, personally speaking, with the fine. Other than a few really deserving kids and families getting a break in life as a result (all Grand-Am fines go to Camp Boggy Creek, a Hole In The Wall Camp), the actual fine is inconsequential to Ganassi, Hull and Keene.

“Okay, so the team gets hurt, financially.” Are you kidding? Shoot, the team’s per-race room and board runs more than the fine. Throw in luxurious transportation in the latest 5-year-old CGR van, and “life’s but a dream” (right Tyler?).

Frankly, this writer just couldn’t bring himself to inquire of Scott Pruett’s thoughts because he probably would’ve conveyed an ear-blistering, “’Hi’ to the family back home,” or something to that effect. But he’s also probably madder than a wet hen (just how “mad” a wet hen may get and “why “are questions best left for Tina Gué.)(With total and complete due respect, Bettina)(I’ll address Lucy another day).

PRUETT PROBABLY MADDER?

It boils down to “integrity” and Pruett doesn’t like his questioned. Further, neither his nor Memo Rojas' deserve questioning. They got in a car, they drove. You think either of them will slack at this point?

Who reading this doesn’t think Ganassi or Hull won’t bring their embarrassment to the attention of Steve Dinan – or even that Dinan doesn’t at this point feel it by osmosis – who in turn will bring it to the attention of those in his employ? There’s going to be a lot of attention paid to integrity – if not that of a person’s, then that of preventing in the future an engine that might’ve, certainly could’ve just slipped through Dinan’s various processes. His people are human, too. It’s likely they, too, are embarrassed, if not mad. But being mad is a typical first stage of embarrassment.

Besides, it seems far more reasonable to assume that Dinan would much rather be known for engines that are more powerful than stated, especially considering a current class action taking to task lawn tractor engine builders like Briggs and Stratton, who have not admitted to intentionally misleading anyone but who is willing to queue tens of millions in dollars to chill everyone having a beef over a stated 19HP engine having only 17, or whatever it really dynoed.

Some, like Ol’ DC, can remember when an Oldsmobile (ask your father) actually had an Oldsmobile engine. When one fellow in the 1970’s learned his Oldsmobile engine was really a Chevy, well, he didn’t like it. And won. Big time. ‘Tis the reason a potential car buyer today will typically see a legal statement, arising again and again, conveying the engine of the BelchFire 2000 may actually have originated at the WimpMobile Carworks.

That’s an area in which NASCAR likes to work: integrity.

(Geesh, sorry, everyone. I just set off a whole ‘nother round of “Cale,” “Richard,” “win,” “1984,” “Daytona,” “Reagan,” “uh-huh” from the you-know-who types, who I suggest go toe-to-toe with Yarborough on that matter, sometime. Just, please, let me know ahead of time so I can buy tickets. Cale’s been known to take a poke or two, you know. Like Ward, he ain’t never gonna be confused with “Big,” except in fighting heart. Indeed, a champion’s heart.)

First, integrity plays a role in racing’s relationships. I’ve certainly screwed up there a time or two and it hurts. But that it hurts is the reason one remembers something to have been wrong and serves to underscore why one should not again do the same.

Second, integrity plays a role when another, somewhat smaller fish like Mike Shank races. Sure, Ganassi and Company might well at present best MSR’s shop or, even, bank account – business or personal (sorry, Mike, but I needed an example) but there is one thing for which NASCAR strives: close competition. It is, in the final analysis, “The Show.”

Though one really can favorably compare, say, Hendrick Motorsports’ shop technology with that of most F1 teams, the reality is that not everyone, not even a good-sized minority can afford to go F1 racing – or, for that matter, afford repetitive F1 attendance costs – because the cost of such racing is so great that eventually paying it is the guy standing in line with his two kids . . . assuming he can afford it.

JJ O’Malley and I, thanks to at Daytona International Speedway president Robin Braig, recently gave away a couple of VIP passes and tickets for Saturday’s racing (Rolex Series in the morning; Sprint Cup at night) at DIS. The guy who called in at just the right time, John Mazur, was just absolutely thrilled we enabled him to take his two kids to the race and treat them to a first-class experience. The fact is, even at NASCAR’s prices, some people won’t have enough money to go around at day’s end. I’m proud we were able to help a couple of kids probably get the thrill of their young lives because they’ll be standing in Victory Lane, for all of Saturday if so desired.

Someday when those kids grow to fully understand what’s going on, Shank and Baron will be the Chip Ganassi’s of that future day because they today were able to race head-to-head, car-to-car, driver-to-driver with Ganassi, now the Big Fish, because he didn’t have a “special” advantage as a result of being a Big Fish.

In the final analysis, that’s what Grand-Am’s Tuesday decision was really all about.

Still, they’re a strange breed, these racers, who the week after helping rebuild a team that burnt to the ground wishes to do nothing more than run over that team on the way to victory and, the week after that, rejoice that they are back in the championship hunt at the expense of yet another team.

“Sure,” they say, “We’d rather do it on the track and in the heat of competition” but don’t you worry, they’ll take it any way they can – as long as it’s “the other guy.”

“Well now it's time to say goodbye to Jed and all his kin

They would like to thank you folks for kindly dropping in

You're all invited back again to this locality

To have a heaping helping of their hospitality

Y'all come back now, hear?”

(Special Thanks to Lester Flatt, Earl Scruggs, The Foggy Mountain Boys and Columbia Records)

Later,

DC